The Marriage Book - Love in Action

I think of all the sections in the Marriage Book, this has to be one my favourites. It is both intriguing and insightful. And I think if everyone was clear about this area, we might have fewer misunderstandings.

So this section talks about the Five Love Languages, a book that was written by Gary Chapman. I've recently read this book (thanks to a good friend who gave it to me for Chinese New Year) and it has helped me understand myself and my partner a lot better. I won't go into too much detail about the book as I'll cover it in this blog entry but there are five love languages, in no particular order:

1. Quality Time
2. Physical Touch
3. Words of Affirmation
4. Acts of Service
5. Gifts

Each of us have an affinity to one or two languages, which we use frequently and which we expect to be reciprocrated by our respective partners. This section goes on to talk about the importance of understanding what is expected from us in showing love and of communicating how we want to be shown love.

For example if your love language is Acts of Service, you would expect your husband to take out the thrash willingly as that signifies that he loves you. However, if his love language is Gifts, he figures that if he never forgets your birthday or Valentine's day, he has already sufficiently shown that he cares for you and probably doesn't see the act of taking out the thrash as something significant. This is a rather simple and shoddy example but I hope you get the gist of it.

I'm still in two minds about what my love language is! If you're curious, you can take this short assessment online to determine what your primary love language is.